Common Sense

Livin' the dream with hakuna matata!


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The Squealer

Hey guys!

Here’s one more story that I wrote and then I’ll go back to posting normal stuff…Hope you like it!

The Squealer

The news van jolted down the dusty country road. Each time we nailed a pot hole the three of us sitting in the back all bounced off the cushions about a foot. It was Larry the camera guy, Doris the producer, and me. I’m JC. My real name is Jacquilyn Clementine. So you can see why I’m called JC. I learned my first day of middle school that boys are never named Jacquilyn, or for that matter Clementine. But anyway, I’m a news reporter for channel 24 based out of Soddy Daisy, TN. I normally report about the weather or the local restaurant review or basically anything else that goes on in this small town. But today we have a special assignment. There have been some suspicious sightings and even deaths in one particular part of our town. I was psyched. I mean stuff like this doesn’t happen every day in our postage stamp size town. This kind of story could mean huge things for my career!

I was yanked out of my daze as our van screeched to a stop. As I slung open the van door I began to hear this odd and kind of obnoxious squealing noise. Then I looked down into the eyes of the tallest and fattest pig I had ever seen in my life. I gulped and tried to refrain from peeing in my pants. Whatever miss-breed it was, it apparently could stare into your soul because he was doing just that. Farmer John suddenly walked up and yanked the pig away from our van so we could all climb out. I quickly jumped out and sort of flattened myself against the van. When John saw me trying to blend in with the huge 24 painted on the van he burst into guffaws and said in a thick country accent, “Now, boy, don’t you be a worryin! This ol’ boy won’t hurt you! Naw not at all!” I beg to differ.

Doris then stepped up and started asking him about what suspicious things he had seen of late. Apparently he’d heard some freaky noises at night. When we asked what made them freaky, he replied, “Welp have you ever heard the dyin’ screams of the wounded? Welp, that jus’ about describes it.” He went on to say that he had missed some crops and tools and things, and then he said, “I was here one day and I found this right here.” What I saw made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. He had walked over to a huge indention in the dirt. The indention was the perfect outline of a human body and some odd foot prints; to be honest they looked sort of like a large…hoof. Farmer John confirmed my suspicions. “Yep, I declare that’s a pig print, and I do believe that it’s from Bertha.” “B-b-bertha?” I stuttered out. Somehow I knew that a pig named Bertha could only mean trouble. “Yep come on, I’ll show ya.”

John lead us over to an enclosed pen. He lifted the latch to open the door. I heard some kind of knocking noise. I looked down and discovered it was my knees. We all walked into a dark room with a dirt floor. The light streaming from the cracks in between the planks of the walls cast eerie shafts of light across the floor. I took one step forward and squished into a pig pie the size of my head. Great. Just what I wanted to have on my shoe for the rest of my time here on earth. I knew that no matter how hard I scrubbed I would feel the poo squishing every time I wore these shoes. I looked up to see everybody way ahead of me. Dodging more pies, I quickly ran to catch up. When we got to the end of the pen we came across another indention. It was the size of a rhinoceros. Seriously, it was HUGE! I figured ol’ Bertha used some kind of steroids. After we had inspected the lair of the beast a bit more, Doris sent Larry and me to get a couple shots out by the first indention. We walked back out, and I swear I hit three more pies. When we arrived at the indention we started setting up. Larry said he had forgotten his film so he ran to the van to get it, leaving me alone. I started walking around doing the awkward tin soldier walk to get the poo off my feet.

Then I heard it. A low guttural snort. I turned and saw…Bertha. She started snorting nonstop and drooling. Her front foot started pawing the ground like a bull, and she started forward. I promptly peed my pants. I started walking backwards, but I tripped over something, and all of a sudden I found myself laying in the indention. It fit me perfectly. I saw Bertha charging. Then she took a flying leap. Before she impaled me into the ground, I passed out.

I was jolted awake when we slammed to a stop. I found myself back in the news van. I almost cried. It had all been a dream! I was not about to become a greasy spot under Bertha’s rear end. I slung the door open happily and stared into the eyes of Bertha, she uttered a low snort.

Well there you have it! Have a good day!

Hakuna Matata!

Ciao Baby!

~Susanna

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Promise

Hey People!

This past Sunday we had the awards ceremony for the Burlington Writers Club. I won third place in middle school fiction and this is my story!

       Promise                                       

            The sun rose over the bay. Its radiant beams hit Freddie’s face. He stared oblivious into the water, the stench of the sewer overwhelming. A pig slowly wobbled toward Freddie, mouth aimed at the plantain in his hand. Freddie jolted out of his daze when the pig’s lips touched his hand. He smacked it across its face and watched as it scrambled away. He then quickly filled his plastic jug full of water and began the trek back home. He passed several of his friends as he maneuvered over the broken and trash strewn streets. When he finally reached his home on the hill, he paused a minute before entering, bracing himself for what lay ahead. He finally stepped over the threshold into the house. The smell of vomit and bad beer assaulting his nose. He glanced over at his dad sleeping off a hangover as usual. He picked past bottles and trash over to the bed where his grandma lay. Her haggard face brightened when his face came into view.

            “Hey Grandma, I’m back.”

            “Hey…”

            A coughing fit assaulted her body as she tried to get even the simplest word out. Freddie knew she was much worse this morning; her body was slowly deteriorating under the conditions. He hurriedly poured her a cup of water from the jug he had just gotten. He picked out a fly from the cup before helping her drink. Once she was done Freddie tried to turn away but she held on tight to his hand. He looked back confused as she began to whisper to him. He leaned in close to be able hear her.

            “Freddie, I’m going to go away soon.”

He tried to protest but she put her other hand over his mouth, quieting him before she continued.

“I know I’m not going to be here much longer, and I’m ok with that now. But Freddie listen to me, please. Promise me that no matter how hard things get or how much your dad drinks or how hopeless things seem, that you’ll remember what I’ve taught you. Promise me, Freddie!”

Freddie looked at her earnest expression and knew what he had to do.

“I promise, Grandma.”

She leaned back at peace from his answer. Freddie turned and hurried out of the house, trying to escape the reality of what he had just done. All that she had taught him? Did she realize how impossible that was for him? His grandma had taught him of God, and she said that this God commanded him to love his enemies. Love the people that have hurt you. And the hardest, love even the people that abuse you…meaning Freddie was commanded to love his dad. That was something that Freddie wasn’t sure he would ever be able to do, no matter how hard he tried.

The day had passed quickly, and Freddie knew it was time to head home again. Something pushed him home faster than normal, and when he reached the house he knew why. A weak voice inside was calling his name. He rushed in and over to the bed to see his grandma struggling to breathe. Her last words were,

“Remember your promise. I love you, Freddie.”

With those words she drew her last breath. Freddie’s legs turned to jello, and he collapsed. He tasted his salty tears before he even knew he was crying. He had known this was coming for weeks, but that didn’t make it any easier to bear. Blindly, he got up and ran out of the house, wanting to escape the death that threatened to swallow him, too. His grandma’s last words were swimming around in his head. His running feet seemed to be screaming at him…pro-mise, pro-mise, pro-mise. He ran until his feet hurt. He wished he could keep running, to leave what had just happened and what was going to happen, but eventually, he cried all he could, and he just sat down staring.  After a long time, he began walking back. He stumbled over the trash and rocks on the path, not fully aware of where he was going until he stumbled into the pastor’s house. He briefly explained what had happened, and grim-faced, the pastor and his two sons followed him back to his house. They removed the body to a coffin that had been brought. Freddie watched them do all of this and watched as they carried it to the church where it would wait to be buried. He then turned mechanically and started walking away in the opposite direction. Not going anywhere specifically, just walking.

A few weeks later after everything had settled into a new normal, Freddie was kicking a soccer ball around. He slammed the ball at a concrete wall over and over, each time with increasing force, until he kicked so hard that his feet flew out from under him, and with a crack, his head hit the dirt. The breath came out of him in a whoosh, and for several seconds he just saw stars. When his breathing finally returned and his vision cleared, he felt a warm liquid at the back of his neck. He swiped his hand to discover blood. He headed home to find some kind of bandage. As he came near his house he heard bottles slamming and someone talking to himself. Hesitating a little, Freddie walked into the house. At soon as his dad saw him, he started screaming something unintelligible at him. Empty bottles littered the table, and before Freddie could make it out the door, his dad grabbed the back of his shirt and slammed him to the ground. For the second time that day, Freddie’s head cracked against the ground, and just before he blacked out, he heard the words his grandma told him, “But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven.”

Well on that happy note I say good day!  🙂

Hakuna Matata!

Ciao Baby!

~Susanna

 

 


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Dancing

Dancing, or lack there of.

I am not a dancer. I enjoy dancing! But people, when I dance its like putting a chain saw in the hands of a squirrel. Like the last skittle in the bowl. Like General Custer’s last stand.

Tragic.

I did take ballet for five years but lord have mercy I know I looked like this going across the stage,

Awkward

Awkward

Glozell

So I tried that. Then I just stuck to dancing at the occasional wedding. For the slow dances it tended to not turn out well.

Dancer #2

But you know, the free style dances don’t always turn out good either…in fact they turn out like this sometimes…

Dance like no ones watching

Not good.

Well I guess you could say that I won’t exactly end up in the hall of fame for dancers…is there even such a thing? There should be.

Anyways…. I hope you guys are better dancers than me!

Hakuna Matata!

Ciao baby!

~Susanna


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Love & Valor

Hey People!

So my brother Jesse,

Jesse

Started the band Love & Valor with Darren and Shea

Love and Valor

And people, their music is….how should I put this… um. AWESOME. I love all of their songs but my two favorites are probably “Saved” and “Sweet Jane” but seriously people, look ’em up on Facebook, like their page, and download their music! You won’t regret it!

Hakuna Matata!

Ciao Baby!

~Susanna


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Acting

Hey People!This semester I am taking a acting class at Arts Alive Fine Arts Studio.

Our class

Acting

*note* we are not all goth but these were just our “costumes” for the play

Right now we are working on the play “Cheaper by the Dozen” (it’s not the Steve Martin version) and it’s going to be AWESOME! This is only my third play so I’m still pretty new to the whole theater thing. But acting kinda runs in the family, my older siblings Hannah, Luke, and Judah are the best at it!

Sin eater

Sin eater #2

These were from the play “The Last Sin Eater” my whole family was involved in everything from the set design to directing.  It was probably one on the best experiences of my life! My sister actually wrote the play, directed it, and acted in it! So basically she’s my hero for life! 😉

I’ll tell y’all some more info about “Cheaper by the Dozen” when we get closer!

Hakuna Matata!

Ciao baby!

~Susanna